Home Colleging : Because You Have no Choice ebook FB2, DOC
9780761158905 English 0761158901 Welcome to Lumpkin Home College Why Lumpkin, you ask? Because, Bradley H. Lumpkin, you took Ceramics instead of Physics. Because "Pot Is My Passion" wasn't a smart topic for your college application essay. Because of that thing with the police. Because, honey, you have no choice."Home Colleging" is the perfect book for any parent who has ever completed the grueling marathon of getting a child into college and for every kid who survived the process. Written by two "Harvard Lampoon" alumnae and coauthors of "How to Regain Your Virginity," and illustrated throughout, this hilarious spoof revolves around Mrs. Lumpkin's plan to home-college her loser son, Bradley. The satire is spot-on: There s the Campus: "Situated on a sweeping quarter acre in a center-hall Colonial that could use some paint" . . . The Mission Statement: "We re just trying to make the best of a bad situation." The Course Catalog: "Archaeology 206: Includes a field trip to Bradley H. Lumpkin s bed, where we will excavate for pizza crusts and coinage, as well as cell phones dating back to the early paleo-iPhone era." Plus Student Clubs (A Cappella in the Shower), Greek Life (Feta Cheese Thursdays), Athletics the court-ordered weekly trip to pick up litter along exits 37 to 39. But do take note: Lumpkin does not have a liquor license.", Welcome to Lumpkin Home College! Why Lumpkin, you ask? Because, Bradley H. Lumpkin, you took Ceramics instead of Physics. Because "Pot Is My Passion" wasn't a smart topic for your college application essay. Because of that thing with the police. Because, honey, you have no choice. Home Colleging is the perfect book for any parent who has ever completed the grueling marathon of getting a child into college--and for every kid who survived the process. Written by two Harvard Lampoon alumnae and coauthors of How to Regain Your Virginity, and illustrated throughout, this hilarious spoof revolves around Mrs. Lumpkin's plan to home-college her loser son, Bradley. The satire is spot-on: There's the Campus: Situated on a sweeping quarter acre in a center-hall Colonial that could use some paint . . . The Mission Statement: We're just trying to make the best of a bad situation. The Course Catalog: Archaeology 206: Includes a field trip to Bradley H. Lumpkin's bed, where we will excavate for pizza crusts and coinage, as well as cell phones dating back to the early paleo-iPhone era. Plus Student Clubs (A Cappella in the Shower), Greek Life (Feta Cheese Thursdays), Athletics--the court-ordered weekly trip to pick up litter along exits 37 to 39. But do take note: Lumpkin does not have a liquor license., When it was time for college, Bradley Lumpkin blew it: He answered "none of the above" to every question on the SATs, his application essay was titled "Pot is My Passion," and then there was that thing with the police. So his mother has taken matters into her own hands. Home Colleging is Florence Lumpkin's plan for Bradley's higher educatione"at home. Situated on sweeping quarter acre in a center-hall Colonial that could use some paint, Lumpkin Home College is a highly selective, no-so-liberal, residential college with a rigorous admission policye"if you are not a blood relative. We accept students who a) were waitlisted at Atlas Air Conditioner Repair School, b) did not get into Williams College and c) are named Bradley H. Lumpkin. From opening day (WELCOME STUDENT!) to the campus (The Quad is the former driveway, where the student and faculty often gather before getting in the car) to the faculty (Florence, Daddy, and Grandma) to the course catalog (Archaeology 206 includes a field trip to Bradley's bed, where we will excavate for pizza crusts, and coinage, as well as cell phones dating back to the early paleo-iPhone era), Home Colleging is a hysterically funny and thoroughly original solution to the problem of 21st century higher education.
9780761158905 English 0761158901 Welcome to Lumpkin Home College Why Lumpkin, you ask? Because, Bradley H. Lumpkin, you took Ceramics instead of Physics. Because "Pot Is My Passion" wasn't a smart topic for your college application essay. Because of that thing with the police. Because, honey, you have no choice."Home Colleging" is the perfect book for any parent who has ever completed the grueling marathon of getting a child into college and for every kid who survived the process. Written by two "Harvard Lampoon" alumnae and coauthors of "How to Regain Your Virginity," and illustrated throughout, this hilarious spoof revolves around Mrs. Lumpkin's plan to home-college her loser son, Bradley. The satire is spot-on: There s the Campus: "Situated on a sweeping quarter acre in a center-hall Colonial that could use some paint" . . . The Mission Statement: "We re just trying to make the best of a bad situation." The Course Catalog: "Archaeology 206: Includes a field trip to Bradley H. Lumpkin s bed, where we will excavate for pizza crusts and coinage, as well as cell phones dating back to the early paleo-iPhone era." Plus Student Clubs (A Cappella in the Shower), Greek Life (Feta Cheese Thursdays), Athletics the court-ordered weekly trip to pick up litter along exits 37 to 39. But do take note: Lumpkin does not have a liquor license.", Welcome to Lumpkin Home College! Why Lumpkin, you ask? Because, Bradley H. Lumpkin, you took Ceramics instead of Physics. Because "Pot Is My Passion" wasn't a smart topic for your college application essay. Because of that thing with the police. Because, honey, you have no choice. Home Colleging is the perfect book for any parent who has ever completed the grueling marathon of getting a child into college--and for every kid who survived the process. Written by two Harvard Lampoon alumnae and coauthors of How to Regain Your Virginity, and illustrated throughout, this hilarious spoof revolves around Mrs. Lumpkin's plan to home-college her loser son, Bradley. The satire is spot-on: There's the Campus: Situated on a sweeping quarter acre in a center-hall Colonial that could use some paint . . . The Mission Statement: We're just trying to make the best of a bad situation. The Course Catalog: Archaeology 206: Includes a field trip to Bradley H. Lumpkin's bed, where we will excavate for pizza crusts and coinage, as well as cell phones dating back to the early paleo-iPhone era. Plus Student Clubs (A Cappella in the Shower), Greek Life (Feta Cheese Thursdays), Athletics--the court-ordered weekly trip to pick up litter along exits 37 to 39. But do take note: Lumpkin does not have a liquor license., When it was time for college, Bradley Lumpkin blew it: He answered "none of the above" to every question on the SATs, his application essay was titled "Pot is My Passion," and then there was that thing with the police. So his mother has taken matters into her own hands. Home Colleging is Florence Lumpkin's plan for Bradley's higher educatione"at home. Situated on sweeping quarter acre in a center-hall Colonial that could use some paint, Lumpkin Home College is a highly selective, no-so-liberal, residential college with a rigorous admission policye"if you are not a blood relative. We accept students who a) were waitlisted at Atlas Air Conditioner Repair School, b) did not get into Williams College and c) are named Bradley H. Lumpkin. From opening day (WELCOME STUDENT!) to the campus (The Quad is the former driveway, where the student and faculty often gather before getting in the car) to the faculty (Florence, Daddy, and Grandma) to the course catalog (Archaeology 206 includes a field trip to Bradley's bed, where we will excavate for pizza crusts, and coinage, as well as cell phones dating back to the early paleo-iPhone era), Home Colleging is a hysterically funny and thoroughly original solution to the problem of 21st century higher education.